Endless options yet limited choices.
Bringing up children is an absolute privilege. I understand that being at home with them is an opportunity not available (or desirable) to everyone. My circumstances at the time of my first child's birth meant that, for me, staying at home was the obvious choice but not necessarily the most expected. Growing up both of my parents worked full time. Myself and my sister were taken care of by our grandparents. This meant early mornings to travel the fifteen minute car journey to their house. My nan would then walk us to school and collect us at the end of the day. Finally we were picked up from our grandparents after my dad finished work and home to spend the evening with our parents. My grandparents were invaluable in allowing both of my parents to pursue their careers. This was the norm to me and I remember my surprise when I first realised that other peoples parents did not go out to work. I found it odd and felt immensely proud of my own working parents. I fully expected to follow the same path, going out to work was just what you did.
Fast forward to the birth of my own child, I was not pursuing a career path, I wasn't working my way up as my own mother had been. My wage was too low to cover the cost of childcare. My partners wage could cover the cost of living but could not go towards both child care and the cost of living! It would have been counter productive to pay someone else to look after our child and so to my own surprise I became a stay at home mum. (Crazy that due to the costs of childcare it worked out better not to work but that is a whole other conversation!)
Adapting to being a stay at home mum felt natural but that isn't to say that I have felt one hundred percent comfortable over the years. I have felt a stigma to being at home, whether that has come from my own expectations or from society I'm not sure. I have guilt for not being out at work in the same way as some working mums feel guilt for being at work! That cycle of never ending mum guilt, (no matter what we do) is ever present!
As someone out of the loop in terms of a career, I find it interesting to learn what other people do. There are job roles I would never know existed if it wasn't for conversations with neighbours or other parents at the school gates. I wonder how people came to have their role and envy those who have had a set career path from a young age. Those people tend to no what they want, set a goal and work to achieve it. I on the other hand always felt like I was fumbling around in the dark with no idea what to do next! Always waiting to be a grown up when I would have all the answers. Countless options out there but no direction.
As I previously mentioned I like the idea of working for myself but am under no illusion as to the hours that would mean to begin with. The financial investment, the stress, the frustrations of the learning process, the mistakes I would inevitably make! Yet I still feel I'd like to try something. I have been looking into areas such as drop shipping or resale online. A few ideas floating about.
Please comment and let me know your role and how you came to be in it. Is your job something you love? A passion that doesn't feel like work? I think that is the ideal! Or does anyone else ever feel like me, like you have been waiting to become a grown up?
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